This week we we asked to share an example of a microaggression that we have witnessed or that has happened in the past. We are aware that microaggressions occur daily and that they are the source of various negative emotions to their victims. One incident in which I observed this week occurred when I was in a passenger in the car with a Caucasian male friend and we stopped at a store to purchase items before going to a mutual friends home. After went purchased our items, we retreated back to the car. As we fastened our seat belts, there was a group of young black males who appeared to be walking past the car. My friend quickly looked his car doors with what I automatically assumed was "fear." The males walked past the car and into the store without incident. I immediately began to discuss this matter and his actions. He began to state that his actions were a "natural reaction." As I began to questions his feelings and thoughts as to why this behavior was natural to him, he stated that it was a behavior that was learned from his friends and family. I further questioned his childhood and questioned his feelings, emotions and behaviors if these behaviors were directed towards him because he is a homosexual. At this time, he has yet to answer me but did text me to apologize for his actions. I responded by accepting his apology but he was further informed that he and I would discuss this matter more thoroughly.
I wanted my friend to understand that treating others differently based on their looks is wrong. I also wanted to discuss his experiences as a gay male. I hope he realizes that the microaggressions, discrimination and prejudice that he becomes a victim of are the same microagressions, discrimination and prejudice that he displayed in front of me.
This observation conjures of experiences that I have been involved in and assists me in having empathy for the victims and anger/pity for those who committed the offense.
I think you handled that situation very well! It would have been easy to be on the defensive with your friend. I think it is great that you discussed WHY he felt compelled to lock his doors. Understanding where these emotions come from is the first step to resolving them. Great job!
ReplyDeleteAnetria,
ReplyDeleteI admire you for addressing the situation. Sometimes it is easier to just not do that because you may risk a friendship by doing so. We all respond to situations by what we have learned or experienced through out our lives, right or wrong. I think we all can grow as human beings by taking the time and risk to develop deeper understandings in terms of other people's ways of thinking. I think back on one of previous classes when we discussed the lenses we look through.
Anetria,
ReplyDeleteAs I was reading your post, I can remember locking my car doors when I see individuals that I don't know. This is partly due to rise in crimes in the neighborhood that I currently reside. It can be a scary world and I don't know what your friend has experienced on a personal level to make that decision. Therefore, I will be careful about how I judge diverse indivduals including your friend. I also thought it was a great thing for you to discuss this matter with him to find out how he is really feeling inside. Thanks for sharing this experience of microaggression!